- For example, I had a pretty hectic week and I'm happy it's Friday...but I've said that nearly every week since starting med school.
- I'm building some great friendships here at Case, but it seems strange to say that since I've only been in school for 60 days. Yet there are a few people here who I know far better than some of the people I interacted with in DC for an entire year.
- I studied for nearly 12 hours today. I feel like I made a lot of progress. And yet I still can't help but think that I'm still re-discovering how to study...often I get done studying and I can't remember a single thing I've learned.
- We started anatomy this week...had dissection labs on Monday and Thursday. Did I pass out or get nauseus? No. Am I comfortable with the idea of cutting through the tissue of a donated body? Not entirely. And did I want to know what it smelled like when you're making cuts with bone saw? Not at all.
- I saw the Navy recruiter at a residency fair today on campus. I still need to sit down look through all the program material. I'm still months away from making a decision....right now I think I'm in denial/avoidance mode. I like so many parts of the program, but there are so many unknowns. What if I want to enter a really competitive residency that would be impossible to get in the military? What if this decision ruins my ability to pursue a career in academic medicine? What if I meet someone in medical school who is perfect for me...except that she doens't want to deal with my mandatory years of service after med school? I could go on and on. I've been thinking about these issues for two or three years now, yet I keep coming back to this program. At least I have a few months to think about it before the deadlines start getting close.
As usual, I'm sure sleep will help. Tomorrow is another day of studying.
Mood: Jumbled. Relieved? Anxious? Lonely?
Song: Jason Mraz, "I'm Yours"
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