What a difference a month makes. The present aspects of my life are nothing like what it was just four week ago. I'm not complaining -- I love school so far, it is fun to explore a new city, and I am excited about the next two years -- but in retrospect it's tough to remember all the emtional changes I've been through this summer. One month ago, I was in a completely different world in that regard.

The summer session was enlightening. I think that's the best word for it. I don't know if it was the timing (right before the MCAT and my departure from California) or the environment (the unique dorm lifestyle of having many of your friends just steps away) or something else entirely...but it made me especially contemplative. I spent a lot of time reflecting on important issues that are usually overlooked in the hustle of day-to-day life.

It was an experience I only shared with a few people, and it's hard for me to understand it without any of them here. It sort of feels like waking suddenly in the middle of the night with a dream's emotional remnants lingering in your mind. You're not really aware of what the dream was about until days or weeks later when something you see or hear suddenly brings it back to the forefront of your mind.

Or something like that.

It's amazing how quickly one can forget certain lessons. In high school I had to learn to appreciate the moment -- to stop worrying about the small stuff, to enjoy and experience the situations that I would never have again. I had to realize that something's always wrong, big or small, and that my inability to let go of the little problems would make it tough to enjoy the big moments. When I organized events, I had to come to terms with the fact that things never went exactly as planned, and that I needed to take them in in stride -- or not deal with them at all -- so I didn't get distacted from the larger picture. If I was in a relationship that wasn't perfect, I had to realize that relationships are inherently difficult and that I certainly wouldn't make things any better by always being distracted from the present by the potential future problems.

I think I forgot that things in life are rarely that clean-cut.

(pause)

Time for bed. Enough thinking for now.